i started this off as a comment in The Random Topic. but then i smoked a bowl and gave it some serious thought. and came up with a possible cathartic solution.i wish i knew how to pull myself up from this funk im in.
i cant shake this overall feeling of self doubt and heaviness of the heart
i think i need to go get tattooed again. its been 5 months since ive gone and its been a pretty rough 5 months. i theorize that going and doing it may serve as a reconnect. its my biggest passion and most obvious goal, something that is done purely for The Self.
the only big thing that has kept me from making the trip to cambridge and getting more tattoo work done these past few months has been money. im still having problems sticking to a budget and saving money. i want to get out of Sarnia, it really has nothing to offer me. but i feel like i need a little more sense of security, financially and emotionally, before i can make steps towards moving on and away.
now getting more tattoo will short term make my money problems seem worse, but in the long term i dont think it will make much of a difference. id still be having the same budgeting issues. and i think the benefit to my spirit will be worth it.
im much more concerned with alleviating this loss of self then solving my money problems